it is summer, and the city tears at me
I breathe in dirt and suffocate
I think of a time years ago
of candy eyes
red lips and silver words
and there are no words I can remember now
among the slogans and empty phrases
the hollow eyes and snakeskin smiles
that seem real to me

I reach out to you
a hollow drum in a dusty basement
beating, muffled under dirty stone
as my memory fades
into dead wood along darkened streets

-------------------

in my eyes a hundred screens of static
blue with a silent terror
as my voice turns, grinds, chews
endless
over and over
silent to deafened ears

I give in
forget the past
forget my mind
and with my body clenched
my mind as water
I fall away to unknown places

I cannot do this
this is not me
I do not understand